Narciscyst Removal

I'm too self-absorbed. I'm also too insecure. I want people to like me so much! Which makes me avoid social interaction, for fear of committing some imagined unforgivable faux pas.
Bear pas. Fauxbia.
Why did I stop playing music? Why do I not like parties? I know too much about me to be able to confidently answer questions about my behavior. All possible motivations are part of the complete motivation.
I think I am avoiding life. Time to have an eat, pray, love moment.
So many people I know are self-loathing narcissists. I miss my old friends. I can't remember when the last time I saw so many of the people I care most about. Too much virtual, not enough reality. This might not be the best forum for expressing that sentiment.
Sent a mint. Kept gum. If Gumby's last name was delicious, he would sound like bad grammar. Not funny.
There is a friend I miss. I'm scared I did something terrible. I have no idea. I'm that dumb. And as sorry as I am stupid.